After The One (The One Series Duet) Page 21

“I have no idea.” I shook my head. “It was seriously awkward. I mean, he was standing right there in front of me. I hadn’t seen him in years and then all of a sudden, he just strolls up as if he were an invited guest and says ‘hey!’ As if he didn’t walk out of my life five years ago and act like I didn’t matter.”

  “Exactly! You loved Tate and he said he loved you. He was all set to spend his life with you until he knew he could get groupie love as a professional athlete so he leaves you and then just pops up at your wedding? That’s shady as hell.”

  “Right? That’s exactly what I was thinking! I haven’t seen or talked to that man in five years. Why would he feel like this would be the time or the place to catch up? And who said I wanted to catch up?”

  Koko crossed her long legs. “Okay so what happened after he walked up to you? And what did he look like?”

  I let my head drop back against the cream pillow of the chair. “He looked like he always looked.”

  “Hot?”

  “Hot as hell.” I paused, taking a sip of water. “He had a navy blue fitted suit and a baby blue shirt that looked really good against his brown skin. He seemed taller and more muscular. He looked like a professional athlete and not like the guy I met outside the library a million years ago.”

  “Were you tempted?”

  My lip curled as I looked at Koko in disbelief. “What? You’re not serious.”

  “One last ride before you become a devoted wife?” she teased, amusement thick in her voice.

  I gave her a look. “Absolutely not. That would be like trading more for less.”

  Even though Julian clearly had no problem trading something for money…something he paid Lillian for…something he said he wasn’t going to tell me…something he’s hiding from me. NO! No, I will not let myself go down that slippery slope. I’m just going to talk to him tomorrow. We are a healthy couple in a healthy relationship. We are honest with each other. We are—

  “Zoe, I was kidding. I promise!” Koko’s wispy voice interrupted my thoughts.

  I waved the thought off and looked over at her. “Oh no, I know. I started thinking about…” I shook my head knowing I needed to talk to Julian about what I’d overheard before I talked to anyone else. “So Tate is standing there looking like he was going to be a commentator on the NFL Network or something and before I could get over the shock of seeing him, Julian walks up.”

  “What?” Koko squeaked, jumping from her seat. She paced in front of me. “What?! Is that what that was all about when I came up?”

  I nodded. “Yeah. Julian comes out of the ballroom and immediately wraps his arms around me. He’s all apologetic for being busy and for his phone dying, and then he kind of looks at Tate like ‘who the hell are you?’ So I introduce them and it doesn’t go well. Julian was a little drunk and Tate was a little bit of an ass so I kicked Tate out. You came up maybe two minutes later and you know Julian had to do that on-air interview thing with Bryce.”

  Koko made a noise that sounded like a cross between a cat with a hairball and dry heaving. “And since Julian went to be interviewed by Leah’s boyfriend, you didn’t have a chance to talk about it?”

  I stifled a giggle. “Okay, first and foremost, he’s not Leah’s boyfriend, he’s your boyfriend. But yeah, we haven’t talked about it. And even if I would’ve stayed, we wouldn’t have been able to talk there. There’s always someone with a camera around. In the contract, they aren’t able to approach me for comment more than once an event; however, if we are together, they can, mainly because Julian is required to talk to them. It sucks because if I’m with him and I don’t speak or acknowledge the camera, I look like a bitch.”

  She sat down, tucking her legs underneath her. “But won’t you be with Julian most of the weekend?”

  “Exactly.” I rolled my eyes. “That was their plan all along, I guess. If I want to spend time with my fiancé at one of the activities for our wedding, I’m inevitably subjected to Julian’s contractual obligations.”

  “That sucks!”

  “Yeah, it does.” We sat in silence for a minute before I stated, “Now, please tell me you came face-to-face with Bryce tonight.”

  Koko sighed loudly. “Yeah, for a second. We talked. He said the same thing he said before.”

  “So…what’s the problem?”

  She was quiet for a long time. “When I saw him with Leah, it wasn’t just the fact that I hate that bitch. It was the fact that it hurt. I mean, it really hurt, and I don’t know if I’m ready to give him that much power over me. He could really hurt me, Zoe.”

  I reached over and grabbed Koko’s hand. “You’re in love.”

  She nodded slowly. “And that scares me.”

  “It can be scary,” I admitted, squeezing her hand once more before letting it go. “It’s always scary when you’re vulnerable, but when you’re with the right person, you also feel safe.”

  “Well I just feel scared. There’s nothing safe about feeling scared for your life.”

  I laughed. “You’re going to be fine. You just need to tell him that you love him.”

  “And what if he doesn’t say it back?”

  “He wouldn’t still be trying to plead his case to you if he didn’t.”

  We sat in silence, lost in our own individual thoughts, hers presumably about Bryce and mine completely focused on Julian.

  I wish his phone hadn’t died. Then I would just call him and tell him to come over tonight so we can talk.

  Minutes passed and then we heard voices. First it was my family and Julian’s family talking outside their villas before going inside. Ten minutes later, the loud, boisterous conversations between my brother and his girlfriend, my cousin, Julian’s cousins, Keisha, Lenny, Omar, Scott, and James shattered the solitude. They were talking about taking a midnight swim in the heated pool.

  Koko stood, folding her arms over her chest. “Let’s go down and party. We need to shake off the stench of our past with a nice stiff drink.”

  I pulled my jacket tighter around me and rubbed my stomach. “I’m tired so I’m going to head to bed. Besides, I won’t be having a nice stiff drink until maybe next fall.” I stopped my hand mid-rub. “Oh, wow…that’s a long time.”

  Koko laughed as she pulled me to my feet and embraced me in the tightest hug. “I’ll drink enough for the both of us. Don’t worry. I got it covered.”

  Chuckling, I squeezed her back. “I’m sure you do.”

  Walking through the rooftop door and down the steps to the patio outside my bedroom, we entered the darkened room quietly. “I still can’t believe Tate is here,” Koko said in a stage whisper. “And I can’t believe I missed him and your interaction with him.”

  I closed and locked the patio door behind us. “You didn’t miss much. He’s a good-looking guy in a nice suit; there were a million of those running around tonight.”

  “Well, if he’s at the rehearsal party, I’m going to punch him in his handsome face. We’ll see how much groupie ass he’ll get with a bloody nose and a black eye.”

  I flipped on the light. “I don’t want you to go to jail. Maybe just a bloody nose.” My voice broke from amusement. I pulled off my jacket and she balled her hands into fists as we crossed the room to the bedroom door. “I’m kidding. Don’t hit him. I’m so over him and that whole situation. I have Julian so I’ve clearly moved on. I was just shocked to see him.”

  With her hand on the bedroom doorknob, Koko turned to look at me. “I would’ve been shocked too—especially with how you used to melt when Tate wore suits.”

  “No, don’t get me wrong. Tate’s definitely hot—”

  Although she was still looking at me, Koko opened the door to leave. I stopped my sentence abruptly as I saw Julian’s muscular frame in the doorway.

  Shit shit shit shit shit! Did he just hear that? I was going to say ‘Tate’s definitely hot, but not hotter than Julian.’ Shit! This looks bad.

  Koko turned her head to see what had captured my attention and screa
med.

  “Julian! You scared the shit out of me!” She fell into a fit of giggles, her gasping breaths raining down over the quiet room.

  Julian stood firm, seemingly unaffected, but I noticed his chest rising and falling quickly indicating that we startled him as well.

  The sound of Koko’s laugh was usually enough to send me spiraling into amusement, but something about the way Julian was staring at me kept me from feeling anything but tense.

  Sensing the mood, Koko collected herself and told us both goodnight before fleeing the scene. We didn’t even get a chance to reply because she ran away so fast.

  Julian walked into the room soundlessly and closed the door behind him.

  “I’ve been calling you,” Julian said simply.

  I couldn’t read his expression and it rubbed me the wrong way. My eyes raked his body. He was still wearing his black pants, but his white dress shirt was untucked and his bowtie was hanging loosely around his neck. He was sexily disheveled and unnervingly calm. I wanted to kiss him and yell at him at the same time.

  It would make for an unproductive conversation, but one hell of a fuck.

  My eyes narrowed a little. “You said your phone was dead so I left my phone on the charger while I sat on the roof.” I put my hands on my hips. “So which is it, your phone is dead or you were calling me?”

  “Both.” He walked toward me, something burning in his grey eyes. Grabbing my hand, he pulled me to the oversized chair in the corner as he continued, “My phone was dead. Bryce had a charger so I charged it during the interview and then I called you.”

  “Well my phone was on the charger so I didn’t get your call.” Even though I was behind him, I gestured to the phone plugged in and sitting on the nightstand. “So…how was the rest of the party?”

  “Everyone seemed to have a good time.” Julian sat down and pulled me into his lap. “But I missed you. I didn’t want to be there without you and I hated that I didn’t have a way to get in touch with you…and how you left.”

  From my position curled in his lap, I couldn’t help but melt into him. My body was made for his and without even thinking about it, I relaxed in his arms.

  “I missed you too,” I replied softly, kissing his lips.

  “I rescheduled our Italy trip. We can go after the baby is born. I was looking at our support system today and we can take a trip whenever. Between your parents and mine, your brother, our friends, we don’t have to go to Italy in January. We can do that in August or whenever you feel up to it. I’ve been thinking about this a lot and honestly, I just want to be married to you. It doesn’t matter what we do or when we do it. As long as I’m with you, that’s all that matters.”

  He kissed me gently, sweetly. Allowing his lips to overpower mine, he controlled the tempo of the kiss and made me dizzy with want.

  My heart exploded with a host of emotions. I inhaled deeply, the butterflies swirling inside me as the unexpected information and the sweetness of his words caught me off guard. I put my hand on my stomach to quell the quiver. I couldn’t get caught up in my emotions. I needed to stay level-headed. Because I could smell the alcohol on his breath, I knew that getting answers would be easier.

  Most people love to tell the whole truth when they’re drunk…but I never worried that Julian wasn’t telling me the whole truth before today. I don’t want to think he changed our honeymoon plans to cover up or distract me from the fact that he was cheating with Lillian. Oh God! He can’t be. He can’t. I need to figure out how to ease into this conversation so it doesn’t come off as accusatory and just see what he says from there. I can do this.

  Before I could open my mouth, Julian looked at me thoughtfully. “Are you worried about if I heard what you said? Because I did and I don’t like it, but I’m not mad.”

  My eyebrows came together in confusion. “What?”

  “About being attracted to Tate. I don’t like that asshole, but I’m not mad that you—”

  “No,” I cut him off mid-sentence. I sat up as much as I could with his arms locking me in place. “I’m not attracted to Tate. I said he was attractive, but I’m not at all attracted to him. You have nothing to worry about.”

  “I’m not jealous,” Julian clarified as he tried to adjust me in his lap. “I’m sorry I was acting like that earlier. I’d had too much to drink and I was already in bad mood. I know what we have. I just saw the way you were looking at him when I came out of the party and I went off.”

  “I was shocked to see him. You didn’t see me looking at him in any other way but shock, because that’s all there was to it. Would I be attracted to him if I wouldn’t have dated him for so long and I didn’t know his personality? Probably. But that’s not the case.”

  Julian nodded, his hunched shoulders relaxing a bit. “I believe you. I just needed to ask.” He cleared his throat. “Did you invite him to the wedding?”

  “What?” My voice was louder than I intended as I pushed myself out of his arms and scrambled to my feet. “I hope you’re kidding.”

  Maybe he had one too many drinks and isn’t thinking clearly because that cannot be a serious question—especially since he was clearly in contact with Lillian and money was exchanged.

  The look in his eyes let me know that he was uncertain. “I’m just trying to understand how he got here. I was asked on camera and I’m not going to lie, it threw me off.”

  My stomach dropped. “Oh no,” I griped, my hands covering my face. Even though it wasn’t my fault, I felt bad about him being blindsided with questions about my ex. I dropped my hands from my face and placed them over my heart. “I’m sorry they ambushed you like that, but no, I didn’t invite him. I haven’t talked to him since we broke up…which was why I was shocked to see him.”

  Julian stood, his face softening. “No, I’m sorry.” He put his hands on my shoulders, rubbing them comfortingly. “I shouldn’t have let them get in my head. I kept my cool when they asked me about it, but…they just got in my head a little. I trust you. I trust what we have. It’s just the bullshit of the show that made me ask.”

  I swallowed hard as I looked up at him, choosing my words carefully. “I understand. It makes sense that you’d want clarification.” I paused. “Speaking of…why did you leave so fast earlier? I was worried.”

  “I had to deal with something.” He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me into his body. “I’m sorry I worried you, but believe me, you have nothing to worry about.”

  I leaned back. My heart felt like it was in my throat. “Oh really?”

  “Really.”

  Silence fell around us as he searched my eyes and I searched his. Seconds ticked by and it became harder for me to breathe.

  “Where were you when the party started?”

  He hesitated, fractionally. “I met with Robert.”

  He lied.

  My stinging eyes dropped to his chest as I tried to gather myself. I was in shock at first and that was why I didn’t hear what he said next.

  “Zoe?”

  I felt myself starting to shake a bit. I raised my head and our eyes met. I could see he was holding something back and it hurt me to my soul. I lifted my eyebrows in question. “I missed the last thing you said. I think I need to lie down.”

  He walked with me to the bed and watched me as I peeled off my leggings. I sat on the bed and he kneeled down in front of me. He ran his hands up and down my bare thighs as I sat in just a tank top and panties.

  “Look at me,” Julian pleaded, trying to catch my gaze.

  I looked at him, but it made my eyes water so I looked away.

  I wanted to call him on his shit. I wanted to just blurt out what I’d overheard, but the words wouldn’t come without tears, and I didn’t want to cry. I didn’t want to show my vulnerability. I didn’t want to believe that I was two days from marrying a man who lied to me, who was hiding stuff from me, who was having secret meetings with an ex and paying her not to tell me. I wanted to be more evolved than to cry over
something as clichéd as that. I wanted to be the strong, independent woman my mother raised me to be.

  I will sleep on it and with a clear, level head, I will ask him point blank what is his involvement with Lillian.

  “Hey, what’s going on? Are you okay?” Julian inquired, concern etched all over his handsome face.

  “I spoke to Robert when I arrived at the meet-and-greet.” My tone was curt, but calm. I resisted the urge to purse my lips even though I felt myself getting mad all over again.

  Well, that lasted all of two seconds.

  Unable to stop myself, I continued, “So I guess I’m trying to figure out how you were in a meeting with him and I saw him on his way out to the golf course.”

  It was the hurt of being lied to and the insult to my intelligence that burned blazingly inside of me. I wanted to have a rational conversation, but I was hurt, tired, and hormonal. I knew if his response felt like a lie, I would snap.

  Julian’s fingers flexed against my hips. “I met with Robert about a situation that came up and then I had to deal with the situation directly.”

  “What was the situation?” My body was tense as I braced myself for his answer.

  He took a deep breath, letting his head drop back momentarily. “I don’t want to stress you out…” He lifted his head. “But Lillian showed up.”

  I nodded slowly. “So you met with Lillian?”

  He chewed on his bottom lip. “Yes. I met with her. And I told her to leave. I didn’t invite her and I really don’t know why she would even be here.”

  “Have you been in contact with her?”

  Julian pulled me to the edge of the bed, closer to him. From his kneeled position, he had to tilt his head up slightly. He stared at me, his body rising and falling with each serrated breath, but he didn’t look nervous or guilty. He appeared calm as he firmly replied, “Yes.”

  I felt better that he was honest with me, but it didn’t stop the hurt of him communicating with his ex behind my back. I swallowed hard. “Why?”

  Silence followed. I could hear my heart pounding in my chest as I waited for him to answer the question.

  “Do you trust me?” His grey eyes implored mine, seeking something more than a simple yes or no.